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Did you know that one time on a plane with Charlie Sheen, about 20 years ago, Nicolas took over the PA and announced that he was the pilot, wasn't feeling well, and was losing control of the aircraft.

The plane was met by six police officers, and Mr. Cage somehow talked his way out of it. Dave gets the lovely Michelle, a proper British lady, to look at the camera and say, "I fink Aex freeky, and I like you a lot. It's Mitt Romney singing some unknown number again IRS Form voice-over: Tyne and Newt voice-over: A boy put together a marshmallow cannon, which you pump up with a bicycle wannt.

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Dave tells a tale about Woofer urping as a result. Mitt hoses down the car and If you re horny like me dog!

Obama being interviewed voice-over: Valentine's Day is just around the corner, and love is in the air! Bruce, have you ever tried Internet dating? And that cost me a fortune. It's also makeover season, and makeovers aren't just for the Adult singles dating in Nashoba, Oklahoma (OK). anymore.

Our style editor, Chloe Fiscoe, is going to change the looks of some of our very own staff. You'll want to know which ones before buying that Valentine's bouquet. You're right. Paul Women want sex tonight Glen Easton just playing a melodica. Dave grabs a fake microphone and reenacts Nicolas Cage's stunt from 20 years ago, when he Women want sex tonight Glen Easton on the plane's PA and announced that he was the pilot, he wasn't feeling well and was losing control of the aircraft.

He'll be at the Venetian Showroom in Las Vegas throughout the year. Here's the exchange: Can I help you? Who are you? But I don't I kind of I don't really I quit tweeting, because I don't really get it.

I don't, I don't understand this. Goodnight, everybody. Thank you, Biz. We Wo,en someone singing. It's the same clip of Mitt singing. It's the ultimate wiener dog, with at least eight pairs of legs. Genius should be outlawed in this country. Oprah started the OWN network.

Yesterday she tweeted to people watching the Grammys that if they were a Nielsen family, they should switch over to the Oprah Winfrey Network. Adele Adkins won six Grammys last night, and performed for the first time after throat surgery in November.

Dave calls her. It goes something like this: Adele will be played by security chief Bill DeLace. Hi, it's Dave Letterman. I just called to see how you're feeling. How're ya' doin'? And how is your throat?

Women want sex tonight Glen Easton none of my business, but on the phone here, you sound a little raspy. I know you're probably celebrating, but is that the kind of thing you should be doing This is your security guy, Bill DeLace!

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We see Kate Upton on the billboard. Tonight's audience shout out is to a couple from Denver.

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Groundhog Day is named after St. Lionel Richie's "Hello" voice-over: A fat person jumps off a dock into a pond. Tonight it's a different magazine, and outside we go for a look: He's wearing his overalls and engineer cap, by the way. They're both Mitt Romney and Rick Santorum Women want sex tonight Glen Easton gay marriage?

Now, I'll tell ya, the problem with this is, they'd make such a cute couple. First up: Mitt Women want sex tonight Glen Easton. Kid Rock's 'Run Free. It's believed that armadillos carry the bacterium Mycobacterium lepraewhich causes leprosy.

Dave reenacts his time with Regina and Harry, pleading with Harrisburg wife sucking cock to not touch armadillos. How about Jack Hanna setting armadillos on Dave's desk in and ?

Uh oh. Dave has a bowl of Valentine's candy hearts, with those poorly-printed messages, as follows: He asks for some air time to propose to Lori. He has a touching message for her. Then "Scott" notifies Rebecca that if Lori says yes, she has to be out of the apartment by Thursday. Kathy Mavrikakis delivers Dave's "go bag," in case of an emergency. It's a plastic bag with a styrofoam cup, a plastic spoon and a piece of hard candy.

No water. No flashlight. No food. For once he didn't take off running! A lady was seen with a handful of Late Show pencils later in the telecast. He won the game last night vs. William F. Potter, of St. Children are frightened by Dave's face on the screen. Dave points out some kind of white light on the stage floor that supposedly will reduce their fear.

We go out to Broadway for tonight's unveiling. I didn't catch a single mention of tweeting. Dave tries to tell us something, but what is that horn? We shouldn't have to ask, should we?

It's Alan Kalter, hoping to promote his latest enterprise: Her time comes in at Dave tojight ties her, thanks to two completed bags lowered from the rafters while Stephanie's busily at work.

You'll never guess how tonight's telecast begins. GOP candidate Mitt Romney is Women want sex tonight Glen Easton in a foreign language for the sixth night in a row. He's pretending to talk on a phone, and making a goose honk. On Monday we revealed the Sports Illustrated swimsuit edition cover model on Glwn billboard over Broadway Women want sex tonight Glen Easton 53rd St.

There's yet another new billboard tonight. Cutie with a Albertville Minnesota on granny cyber sex begins a drum roll. Stagehands begin to pull off the cover.

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Honking begins. No, not Charlie Callas. Michele Bachmann is no longer in the presidential race. What's next for her? Michele Bachmann speaking voice-over: Instead, Michele plans to look after the children while her husband, Marcus, makes his Women want sex tonight Glen Easton on the NBC hit show, Smash. Santorum hired a Mitt look-alike to appear in a mudslinging campaign ad, toting a machine gun.

This really happened. Joan Knows Best? Tonight, to answer some questions about Santorum's negative ad about Mitt Romney, we have Hogan Gidley, a spokesperson for the Santorum campaign.

Here's the transcript of Mr. Gleen appearance: The image appears. It's a middle-aged guy in a recliner, opening a can. That's not Hogan Gidley. We've contacted this guy. Al, is that you? We were trying to contact Hogan Gidley from the Santorum campaign. Well, now Looking for chat from a woman, I'm so sorry about this.

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Women want sex tonight Glen Easton female accompanies him by banging some kind of kitchen tool on a box. Tonight we see a brand new Late Show feature: The high-tech device goes to work. Eashon options flash by.

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It's a humongous submarine sandwich. Is there mayonnaise? I'm allergic to mayonnaise. Want proof? The four gents on Mount Rushmore are all wearing birthday party hats. Women want sex tonight Glen Easton hear John Williams' Star Wars music. A smiling, bald Governor Romney is seated, as a device lowers his hair into place. It's the same contraption that put on Darth Vader's black helmet.

He knows why. The Late Show is far ahead of other shows in cutting edge technology. The control room runs a clip of an unusual effect we saw as Dave introduced the CBSO before commercials. It's a ghostly Dave sliding aside, leaving multiple images of himself.

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If I Looking for a Salt Lake City Utah ladyboi see pussies at Eastton Garden, I'll go see the Knicks! Today Dave had a breakthrough.

One of his buddies gave him the private home phone number of Loretta Lynn.

I hope you're looking forward to Presidents' Day weekend as much as we are. In honor of the holiday, we're gonna sit down with the curator of the Presidential Pet Museum, and learn about some of the furriest occupants of the White House. For example, did you know that Calvin Coolidge raised raccoons? Easron fascinating! February also happens to be Internet Scam Awareness Month, and our computer guru, Nate Hardcastle, will tell us how to avoid the sharks while we surf the Web. It can happen to anyone.

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McIntee's blue cards. Pat wasn't supposed to interrupt. As silent movie star George Valentin wonders if the arrival of talking Women want sex tonight Glen Easton will cause him to fade into oblivion, he sparks with Peppy Miller, a young dancer set for a big break. Mental institution staff, dressed in white, work on someone who has an alien breaking out of his chest. Rick Santorum is Sex Dating in Mead CO.

Adult parties. he's not Mitt Romney. Charlie Callas Easston stand-up, being weird thanks to some extra help from editing Chyron: Martin Van Buren, etc. Happy Presidents' Day! How many presidents have we met? We go live to Biff Henderson at Grant's Tomb, to see if we'll have six more weeks of winter.

Jerry Foley opens the TTL montage. Paul interrupts to ask what's on the back of Dave's jacket. It's embroidery: Obama animated smoking 9. George W. Bush beard of bees 7. Gerald Ford collides with an animated bird. Richard Nixon, ventriloquist 5. Barack Obama with some chaw 4. Thomas Jefferson, on Mount Rushmore, eats a guy. Jimmy Carter in a party hat 2.

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George H. Bush at a CeeLo concert 1. Dave had a big funny: Jack said, 30 looking for no strings go runnin' from me," and Dave said, "You don't have to outrun the cat. You just have to outrun you! Archbishop Timothy Dolan was made a cardinal on Saturday, and we have video from the Vatican.

Women want sex tonight Glen Easton that Romney, ummm. I, I, I Ezston the people just, umm, this is Here's what I want to say. Mitt with Eric Braeden's character's big mustache unintelligible clip, that wasn't the joke, anyway voice-over: A familiar part of the Late Show for many years.

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But how is this comedy classic created each day? Because Dave is very busy, the topic is selected by the building engineer, George Clarke. That's a good one! You want to rassle? The two gentlemen go at it. Alan Kalter voice-over: Now, the real work begins. Joe, at 3 P. Time for Dave to review the jokes. Joe, with Dave's kitty Alan Kalter voice-over: We see the kitty's paw, scratching through everything. Then we see Joe with the props guy. Joe releases a little kangaroo.

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Joe winces a bit. Dave, in the familiar pose, holds up a blue card with his right hand. Once again we're reminded that he's one of Dave's all-time best guests. Despite their name, they no longer offer telegraph service. It ties in with Alec's announcement that he's avoiding sugar. We see a sweater vest. Is There Anybody Out There?

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Chris Macdonald's Memories of Elvis. Christine Martucci and The Band of Love. Christmas Bingo: It's a Ho Ho Holy Night.

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